10/21/2011

A is for Alison, it is also for Amphibian (like my life here between the city and the campo), and Armadillo soup, and Adaptation.
B is for Biombos (slingshots), and Babies, and new Beginnings (this month marks the end of my integration period and the onset of my real job.)
C is for cleanliness (which is a very relative term) and coffee addictions, and cultural integration complete
D is for Dirt floors, and Downpours, and Dripping water into my house
E is for Every day a new day, Experiences, Education and Environment
F is for Fungus and Fireflies and Funerals and Friends
G is for Grinning Girls in my afterschool nature and science program
H is for my new Home, for the Hospitality i have recieved, and for the Hardships my community has been facing lately
I is for Ice cream dreams :)
J is for Joron (a palm thatch hut we use to store rice after harvesting)
K is for Kingfishers, which always brighten my day when they fly by
L is for Learning, for Lack of Latrine (at my new house), and for oh-so-much-Love
N is for naranjas, novelty wearing off, and no more rice please
O is for open eyes, open arms, open heart
P is for PATIENCE PATIENCE PATIENCE
Q is for questioning, quebradas (streams) filling up with the rainy season upon us
R is for rain, for reality checks, for the unfinished rancho at my new place
S is for starlight and simplicity and stoves
T is for time to get to work!! it is also for Traditions, held by a thread from the brink of extinction
U is for umbrellas- and plenty.
V is for the vegetables i am hoping will grow
W is for walking uphills both ways. literally. and waiting and waiting, and water.
X is for Jesus of course who died on the cross.
Y is for yearning for a purpose, for a plan
and Z. Z is the unknown yet to come...

It's been so long since I have written. i suppose i ought to apologize. things got busy...

what have i been up to exactly? Well, i've moved out. i'm on my own now, though my housing situation is still being worked out. Got a bed made for me- so that's a big improvement on the hammock. I also have a stove, which I find I seldom get to use because people still feed me a ridiculous amount of rice every time i walk by their house. They are working on building me a rancho, or outdoor living space, since my house is just one room and the entirety of my wet closet is abundantly hanging from every available hook in hopes that it will one day dry. The rainy season has sort of put a damper (literally) on things, as it makes it hard to work in the mudpit below the rancho. Not to mention the moon, which is new, and apparently that means we cannot cut palm leaves because they will rot faster or be attacked by caterpillars. So i find myself, for the moment, awaiting the moon and awaiting the sun. And awaiting my job, too.

i had my community analysis presentation this past week with my community and my peace corps boss. it went really well. i was surprised at how many people came given the amount of rain we had that day, but they showed up and participated and i got some really good feedback about what the community feels they need in terms of environmental support. the four themes that emerged were: getting more fuel-efficient cookstoves for the families that still use three-stone fires, soliciting more support from the environmental agency with regards to enforcing laws within the reserve, continuing to support efforts in conserving soils and water supplies, and more environmental education. so the next steps? well....i guess you will find out when i do! it's a process.

i think i've learned that part of the peace corps experience is the floundering. there's something to be gained from floundering. it's kind of like doggie paddling, you know? for example when you get a new puppy and you let them loose in the lake or pool and they kind of bob and weave and splash in the most un-elegant and un-coordinated fashion possible, but after a few tries they start to develop a sort of technique and get into the grove of it, and before you know it they take off swimming laps. i'm in the un-elegant, un-coordinated, a-rhythmic and overly-zealous splashing phase of my peace corps experience. i'm okay with that, though. i can only go forward from here! grace has never been my finest quality.

I've really slacked off on my 5-memories of the day account, unfortunately, so this letter will probably have a different tone. I've caught the "pensive" bug lately which means I've been more focused on making sense of things than making lists of them. There's been some good which has resulted of this, though, and I realize that I am now in the study of myself and less in the study of my community. I am happy, though, which is the important thing (and healthy, too! yippee!) Yearning, though..... why is that? Because I, being an efficiency-minded ambitious north-american girl with good intentions and big dreams, want to get working as soon as possible, which is just not in the stars for the moment. For one thing our school is kind of a mess- between the director being out for surgery for 2 weeks and the other teacher's mother being critically ill in the hospital- it's simply not an appropriate time to approach the school about asking them helping me to write a work plan for integrating environmental education into their classes. That would be a little self-serving, don't you think? There's also been 2 funerals in the last 2 weeks which has been hard on everyone, especially the families, and rather than focusing on work I've decided it's more important to go spend time with the people. (Here it is tradition to accompany the families of the beloved for nine nights after the death). Then there's the weather. A) It's raining, and B) the rice must be harvested before it germinates and the corn planted so that it germinates, which means that people here are just really really busy. not a great time to call a meeting when everyone just wants to make sure they'll have enough food to feed their many hungry mouths at home in the upcoming months. So, I am sharpening the Peace Corps fundamental skill #1: PATIENCE. Gettin' sharper by the day, I tell ya.

I have, however, had some minor successes. I had a junta to build my rancho, which is pretty cool from a cultural perspective. It's a dying tradition here, but still practiced on the rare occasion. It's basically when you ask the community to get together and help you do something (like build a house or harvest) and instead of paying them you just provide food and drinks and when the day comes that one of your workers calls a junta, you "owe" them a days' hard work. I had 10 workers show up, and my ex-host mom Yita and I made rice and beans (guacho) and corn juice (chicha) for everyone. The rain put the junta to an early end though, leaving a mud pit outside my front door which I just in the last few days attacked fervently with a shovel and a lot of jumping up and down (crazy gringa!) to pack the earth back in place. when the moon is full and it is not raining they will finish, so i have a little while to think about what kind of food i will make for the next go-about. for the moment it suffices- i can now hang my clothes outside to "sun" and people can visit me and have a place to stand (i dont have any benches or chairs yet...)

I also have been leading this girls' afterschool nature and science exchange program with the ELC from fort collins. I have all of the 4th 5th and 6th grade girls for 1.5 hours each tuesday. it's just a blink of the eye in terms of time, but it makes my week. i love a) working with the girls and providing them with quality experiences in nature, and b) having a set schedule. gosh, structure sure feels warm and homey.....

Lastly I have taken the initiative to plant some damn vegetables at my house- i just started the seedlings and will transplant them in about a month. I dont care how many people tell me that you cant grow this or that or the other, or that they are too busy to start their home plots but yes they are interested, or that its raining too much, or that the summer will be too hot-- whatever. at this point, i sure dont believe they are experts in this kind of thing whatsoever (as they do not and have never grown anything of the sort), so ive decided to experiment and decide for myself. we need some better nutrition in this community and if i can at least get something to grow it's better than nothing at all. there's a perfectly logical reason they all have stunted growth and stunted learning, which is that corn and rice and yuca is not a complete diet. however there's a perfectly illogical reason that they do not have a complete diet--we have great agricultural lands and skills, so in my opinion, it's that they simply are afraid to try to grow new things, to cook with them too. i am bound and determined to get a home garden project going here- even just using my own as a demonstration- perhaps complemented by some cooking classes (says the woman who cannot cook---might need to call in backup for this one). no more of this pure rice nonsense!! i say let's put this good earth to good eating.

Well, folks, I guess that's a pretty good update for the moment. I have just one more thing to add, which is that I'm working on a new personal goal of mine. I hope to learn to live as sustainably as they do by the time I leave. I look at the way I eat and live and realize how much of it is disposable, comes from miles away, oceans, even. My trashbag fills up and I carry it out with me to dispose of it in the city, but theirs rarely fills (well and there's no bag or collection of trash really..it's just gone with the wind or into the creek or burned, but those are minor details aside from the point). the point is though that a lot of it is just orange peels and rice husks, brooms made from sticks and grass, wooden chairs and beds, bamboo walls, palm thatch roofs. Sure, they are on the brink of a massive divide that bridges the consumer culture from the producer culture, but standing here on the consumer side, I must say they've got a good thing going. It's a shame to recognize that the more "developed" they become (I use quotations because that word just doesnt seem appropriate) the more they will move away from the sustainability they already execute so well. I wish development wasn't in bed with consumerism. I wish convenience wasn't so dependent on the proliferation of trash, the simultaneous loss of agriculture and the culture agriculture sustains. I don't like the thought of Ciprian becoming a town with televisions that will eventually be tossed into the trash heap and burned or left to seep into the soil in the back yard. The idea of my little Ciprian girls becoming obsessed with their body images as a result of all the commercials and advertisements they will be seeing once we get electricity. I don't like the thought of trash lining the streets and people trading out their leather hand-crafted, made-with-love cutarras for a pair of rubber sneakers made in China by underpaid employees from toxic materials that will take generations to decompose......Buying baseball camps instead of wearing the woven grass sombreros. God- that would be terrible if the sombrero died off. I don't even like the idea of children pursuing higher education because it means moving away from Ciprian, leaving just an older population and leaving the tradition, the folklore, the culture, to be eventually buried along with their parents and grandparents. Maybe that's just part of how humans change and societies evolve, but I don't feel like that's right. There must be another way. How does a society maintain and preserve culture, maintain and preserve sustainability, and develop at the same time? It's worth taking a moment to think about...it has me thinking, anyway.

anyway, i will leave you with that food for thought and get back to "work"- the work of planning how i plan to work. and when. and in what. ahh the great peace corps inquiry....hehe.

I am missing you all and hope to hear from you soon (or even better a visit!). i will send a link for some new photos ahorita, so keep your eyes peeled.

I love you all so much. big hugs and kisses!


P.S. I received a package (thank you, sweet little sister) which means I know this address works, so that's pretty exciting! write it down!

Alison Eden
Entrega General 0600-01
Quebrada del Ciprian de Las Minas
Chitre, Herrera
Rep. de Panama
Panama